Thursday, February 04, 2010

Melancholy

rose

My mother died in her sleep today, 70 years old.

I wish things could have been different,
and that she would have chosen her grandkids and family,
instead of alcohol and pills,
many years ago,
when she had the chance.

I am glad I  had the strength to be strong for my girls,
and that they have not had to live through the hell with alcoholism and drug abuse!

I have often missed you and the relationship we could have had !
Rest in peace mum.

82 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry for your loss - and also for what you must have gone through due to your mother's choices.

    I congratulate you on giving your daughters a strong example!

    Sending you hugs today.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I am so sorry to hear your news.
    It is wonderful that you chose a different path, not everyone does.
    I wish you and your family all the best.<3

    ReplyDelete
  3. Kondolerer! Det er trist å miste mor, selv om du kanskje på mange måter føler at du har mistet henne for lenge siden, slik som du beskriver henne.
    Jeg VET hvordan det kan være, min mor hadde de samme problemene, til hun døde, 70 år gml.
    Jeg tenker på deg, og føler med deg i sorgen! Klem....

    ReplyDelete
  4. Mine tanker går til deg og dine, Hanne.....

    ReplyDelete
  5. Sorry about the loss of your mom..twice...life should not be so hard. I am glad you overcame for yourself and your children!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Har gråte nokre tårer både for deg og meg i kveld, føler med deg!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Tenker på deg, Hanne.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I'm so sorry for your loss. :0(

    ReplyDelete
  9. I'm so sorry for your loss Hanne, you and your family are in my thoughts.
    *hugs*
    Tazzie

    ReplyDelete
  10. Sorry for your loss Hanne
    I lost my dad to cancer after a lifetime of enduring his alcohol antics/trials but when he got cancer he stopped drinking and for three years we got to see the real man behind the bottle...what a blessing that was..who would think cancer would be the thing that made him stop drinking when he couldn't all those years for his family...sigh

    ReplyDelete
  11. I'm so sorry for you loss. But good for you creating the kind of life you wanted with your girls. Hugs, Paula

    ReplyDelete
  12. Thinking of you at this time as you struggle with memories and what may of been. Be kind to yourself xxx

    ReplyDelete
  13. Mange klemmer fra meg til deg, Sissel

    ReplyDelete
  14. I am so very sorry for your loss and for the missed opportunities and the should-have-beens and could-have-beens!

    Sending you lots and lots of hugs, my ex-husband was an alcoholic drug addict. I can only imagine how hard and heartbreaking it must be when it is your parent who is a substance abuser.

    Take care and be gentle with yourself.

    Sally

    ReplyDelete
  15. I am so sorry Hanne for your loss and proud of you at the same time for choosing the better path for yourself and your girls.

    You are in my thoughts and prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  16. My heart goes out to you. What a hard thing to go through. I admire the life you have chosen to live in spite of everything and the beauty you create and share with your quilting talent.

    ReplyDelete
  17. (((Big Cyber Hugs))) for you.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Anonymous1:21 am

    Dear Hanne,
    my best and heartful thoughts are with you....
    With a BIG, friendly (((HUG)))
    NADINE

    ReplyDelete
  19. I am so sorry for your loss. Take care of yourself at this time!
    Marianne in Vermont

    ReplyDelete
  20. I'm sorry to hear about your mom. It is sad when people make bad choices. I am sorry for all of the things that could have been.
    You are in my thoughts and prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Anonymous2:12 am

    God bless you and yours always! You chose love inspite of everything!

    ReplyDelete
  22. i grieve with thee

    my own children have watched as their father has struggled with the same demons ... i do understand your pain ... take good care

    ReplyDelete
  23. Hanne, I am so sorry for your loss and the suffering. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Sending peace, strength and healing thoughts for the days ahead. Grief has many stages, be kind to yourself in the midst of this stage of life's journey.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Hugs & love Hanne.

    Grew up in it; married it and have left it far behind.

    You're a tremendously strong woman who learned how to make the good choices in life when others did not.

    Dwell on the positive, and remember her fondly.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Hanne, I am so very sorry. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers at this very difficult time. Be safe and may God bless you. Big Hugs.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Hanne, I am so sad for your loss and for the special things that you have missed sharing with your Mum. Be thankful you had driven down the right path for who you are and your family.
    hugs Deb

    ReplyDelete
  28. I am so sorry for your loss. I lived through much of the same with my father and I completely understand. God Bless you and your family.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Hanne I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  30. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. But, I am very proud of you for the choices you have made. My father was an alcoholic and it made it very difficult for our family. I, too, was determined that this would not affect my children and my life. We have been successful, but sad that he wasn't able to enjoy his grandchildren. May the Lord bless and comfort you and yours at this time.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Such sad news Hanne, I wish life could have been different for you. Good for you for having the strength to make a good life for you and your family.
    Hugs,
    Joy

    ReplyDelete
  32. kondolerer, - trist og tøft.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Sorry for your loss, dear Hanne. I know your Mom had a beautiful success in her life: you. God bless you and your family with His peace.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Kondolerer. Det er trist å miste ei mor uansett. Godt at du og døtrene dine er sterke. Eg tenkjer på deg. Lykke til vidare framover. Klem Frå Jofrid

    ReplyDelete
  35. Hanne, please accept my condolences on the loss of your mom. I hope you find comfort in the company of your other family members.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Heisan Hanne ;)
    Kondolerer - tenker på deg og dine, ikkje lett dette .
    Smil fra monika

    ReplyDelete
  37. Kondolere Hanne, måtte du finne styrke i dine nærmeste og velsigne deg og dine. Varm klem Hanne-Kristine

    ReplyDelete
  38. Beklagar, jättetrist. Tänker på dig och de dina! Kram

    ReplyDelete
  39. Klem og mange gode tanker til deg og dine!Hilsen Bodil

    ReplyDelete
  40. Anonymous12:27 pm

    All my condolences Hanne, to you and your family.

    ReplyDelete
  41. (((hugs))) my thoughts are with you and your family.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Oh, Hanne, what a strange mixture of feelings you must be experiencing, good and bad memories together. I am sorry for your sadness and I am very happy that you 'changed the pattern' set before you - your daughters will want to be like you; that is a big achievement and a reward. I hope you have a peaceful day to think about her, xxx

    ReplyDelete
  43. ((hugs))

    take care

    ReplyDelete
  44. Kondulerer,Hanne,det er alltid vondt og spesielt å miste sin mor. Tenker på deg,klem fra Grethe.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Sorry for your loss. I am proud of you for choosing a different life for you and your family. Hugs

    ReplyDelete
  46. Kondolerer Hanne. Uansett hvordan ting har vært så har hun vært mamma'n din og det rører nok mange følelser i hodet ditt om dagen. Vær stolt av det du har klart med dine barn. Tenker på deg. Klem.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Anonymous4:05 pm

    I am sorry for your loss, Hanne. As you said, may your mum's soul rest in peace.
    You are a wonderful wonderful woman. I'm sure she was very proud of you.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Kondolerer. Mine tanker går til deg og dine i en tung stund :-) Klem

    ReplyDelete
  49. Kondolerer kjære du. Alkohol er ødeleggende for mange parter.Hadde det slik selv, og har glemt mye fra min barndom. Kanskje like bra. Masse klemmer til deg. Ta vare på dine.

    ReplyDelete
  50. dear Hanne,
    it is difficult for me to confort you in english, but I want you to know I think to you and feel compassion.
    my mother died when she was 41 and my father when he was 73.
    even we are prepared it is never like we thougth to lost our parents.
    glad you choosed the life you wanted.
    friendly
    Marie from France

    ReplyDelete
  51. My heart weeps for you and your girls.

    ReplyDelete
  52. Gode tanker til deg Hanne.

    ReplyDelete
  53. Dear Hanne, I'll send you some heartful thoughts, too. Hugs...

    ReplyDelete
  54. Føler med deg. Masse varme tanker fra oss her til alle dere. Klem

    ReplyDelete
  55. Trist å høre. Tenker på deg og dine. Er glad du valgte en annen vei og stiller opp for din egen familie. Klem fra meg.

    ReplyDelete
  56. The loss of one's mother is especially difficult. My mother and I were never close and her passing thirty years ago is still difficult sometimes.

    I light a candle for you and your family and one for your mother. You will find peace in your heart. Your quilting friends support you.
    Cathy in Shipshe

    ReplyDelete
  57. Kondolerer! Tenker på deg og dine. Klemmer fra Merete

    ReplyDelete
  58. Dear Hanne, thinking of you and your family during this sad time

    Pam M, Australia

    ReplyDelete
  59. Wishing you peace at this difficult time Hanne.

    ReplyDelete
  60. Im sorry for your loss Hanne, its hard for me to comfort you in english, but Im proud of you and the way you chosen to live for you and your girls

    I send you a hug,
    for you and your girls

    Ale
    from Mexico.

    ReplyDelete
  61. Tenker på dere.

    ReplyDelete
  62. Anonymous9:33 am

    My thoughts are with you.

    ReplyDelete
  63. Hanne,
    I wish you the strength that you need to overcome this loss. I'll pray that your mixed feelings will be organised in some way.
    May she rest in peace.

    ReplyDelete
  64. Stor kram till dig Hanne...
    Tänker på dig och de dina... jag vet precis vad alkohol problem kan ställa till med.. Glad att du har styrkan..

    ReplyDelete
  65. Kjære Hanne, jeg kondolerer! Jeg tenker på deg og din familie. Trist å minste mamma to ganger, slik som du har gjot.
    En stor klem fra meg.

    ReplyDelete
  66. I am so sorry for your loss. I dealt with the same issues with my mother so I have an idea of what you are feeling now. Despite her demons your mom raised you and you seem like a great person! Try to focus on the good memories as you heal. God Bless.

    ReplyDelete
  67. Hugs ...
    just to say : wera stand by you and your family

    ReplyDelete
  68. Kondolerer, Hanne. Tenker på deg, og håper du til tross for omstendighetene har det bra. Du er sterk. Klem,
    Laila

    ReplyDelete
  69. May the good Lord bless you and comfort you in this time of need. Remember to always be their for them. My prayers are with you.

    ReplyDelete
  70. Anonymous11:04 am

    Kondolerer, Hanne. Nå begynner en ny fase av sorgen, og på andre siden av den vil du være enda sterkere. Klem fra Elisabeth.

    ReplyDelete
  71. May you find peace in your heart and may love of family and friends surround you. Feel the warmth of all the cyber ((hugs)).

    ReplyDelete
  72. Tänker på dig och din familj. Varma kramar till er alla.

    ReplyDelete
  73. Sorry to hear your sad news. My thoughts are with you and your family

    ReplyDelete
  74. I'm so sorry to hear of your loss Hanne. My Mom and I weren't close until the last year or so before she passed away. I cherish that brief time but feel so sad for the other 58 wasted years.

    ReplyDelete
  75. Im sorry for your loss. My mom passed one month ago today. I was in a similar situation but only with alcohol...we had a good childhood, but couldve been better without the drinking. Im sorry again.

    ReplyDelete
  76. I'm so sorry... God bless you and your family!

    ReplyDelete
  77. Hanne, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. You and your family are in my prayers. Sending hugs...

    ReplyDelete
  78. So sorry for the loss of your mum and what might have been. So great you have broken the cycle with your girls. Hugs...Loretta SE Alaska

    ReplyDelete
  79. I'm sorry to read of your loss Hanne, it is not easy to lose a parent no matter the circumstances. Gather your family close and give yourself time to grieve during this time. -Evelyn

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for visiting my blog :-)
Your lovely comments are very much appreciated.
Wishing you a wonderful day, wherever you are!